Friday, May 23, 2014

First it sweet then.. Its sour

The only thing I have left of us is just memories. The memory of you smiling. The memory of us laughing together over something ridiculously silly. The memory of us talk about some sort of stuff. Now all I can do is just replay it in my mind, over and over again. And I can't even talk to you or tell you how much I miss you without feeling hurt afterwards 'cause it just wasn't the same anymore. They say to go and chase after what you want, but in case of this thing that you want turns out to be a someone, what if they don't want to be chase? What did you do then? Letting that person go? Is that what you do when you care about someone? Aren't you supposed to fight like hell? I am confused, and am so tired of reading between the lines. 

Remembering the times that we had. first it sweet then.. Its sour. Its like you woke up one morning, and decided that you don't want me anymore. I dont think about you anymore, but i don't think about you any less. I never get it how things really work and never even feel this desperate to make things like it used to. 

They say action speaks louder than words and sometimes silence can be heard, but this time, all I hear is a complete silence. Silence that only he understand the meaning behind it. He keep running. Running away from his feelings, us, everything. And its like being put on a chain, so every time I tried to let him go, when he runs, I still get dragged anyway.

Do you ever feel that kind of love that makes you a much better person and just by loving them and feel loved by that person makes you feel like you have enough? That kind of love that makes you feel like that person is your saving grace? And all you want is that things wouldn't change, and that beautiful thing you have wouldn't end too fast or simply wouldn't end at all? 

I want to know how that feels like. I want to feel that kind of love. So far though, my luck on love is just not on my side. I guess it will never be on my side. 

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